I let go of something close to my heart yesterday. I sent it off into the world. I wonder what will come back to me.
Once I would have spent the moments after this choice worrying - listening to the little inner voice that sometimes has such power over me. Do you have one as well?
I put my name in the hat. I crafted a cover letter and tweaked my resume and sent it off to a place I admire, a group living and working into great values. I would be honored to be a part of their team.
And that's when it happened: That exhilarating, terrifying, achingly sweet climbing the hill of the roller coaster feeling.
It’s taken me a long time to get here. Imagine climbing the hill slowly in the car of the Big Thunder Mountain Railroad. Hearing the clickety-clack-clickety-clack of the gears working to tow us slowly forward and upward. It feels so awkwardly slow, ancient, excruciating, perhaps it’s broken? Why is it taking so long? And then all of a sudden with the rush of cresting the hill we can see for miles around in every direction, a clarity, a fleeting knowingness and in an instant – whoosh – we’re down at the bottom, once again.
What am I waiting for? Let’s do it again!
I wish I could take your hand and walk you through to the place where I now stand. I feel solid. I’m no longer worried about whether I receive a reply or what exactly comes of my action.
Mostly I feel at peace. Grateful for the courage to ask for something I’ve longed for. Curious to discover what I’ll ask for next.
And I wonder how long I’ll stay here this time.
I woke up this morning not with anger or dread but with contentment. It may not sound as exciting on the outside, but it feels a whole lot better on the inside.
I’m finding that there’s a calm that comes with knowing what I want. A willingness to wait patiently. A sense that it may take a while but it’s on its way.
Certainty. Clarity. Resolve.
*I’m on my way. *
And at the same time I’m exactly where I need to be. I wish I could take your hand and guide you through to this place. I’ll be waiting right here, when you get here. You’re on your way. I can feel it.
And when we leave, which we all do from time to time, we’ll always know exactly how to find our way back.
*From Fear to Love in 40 Days. Join me. * With Love and a BIG Warm Hug,
© Copyright Clea Shannon 2014 | Eat Inspired Today™ LLC
Find my healthy inspiration and images from my 40 day challenge on Instagram @liveinspiredtoday
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